To the mouth of the crocodile

This was not one of the missions we would intend to accomplish. No matter how adventurous we are there is a high likelihood that we would not even desire to attempt it. I call it the journey to the crocodiles mouth. I try to explore the possibility of having some bit of fun but the sharp edges of its teeth just assure me i will end up soaked in blood. Their large number of teeth guarantee me assurance of all my bones being ground into pieces. This is a matter of life and death and truth be told i hope i will be like Jonah. Can this crocodile vomit me in the deep ocean. i have to go in there . For their sake i must do it. But this makes me a sacrificial lamb. To some extent this is the price i have to pay. Why are we Kenyans like this??? Kukwepa jukumu is our favorite tact. With that we just evade our problems. i am very very very scared. if he does not chew me alive, i hope he can vomit me out there. Now i thought he was the crocodile but i was wrong i just met head on with the cobra. He has an I don't care attitude. The one that makes u feel like you will strangle somebody. i felt like doing that to him. That's not my problem. That's a porblem of yours. Talk of bad Tuesdays.... i may comfortably say i don't care but i do and well it hurt. Real hard. If this does not get to you through my words of mouth, you can get it better expressed through written words. I can engrave them on stone.

All i want

I want very simple things
I want to understand you
I want to you to hear me out
I want we cherish each other
I want more time for us
I want you near me
I want to hear your heartbeat
I want to spend a silent moment with you
I want to just look in your eyes
I want to see my reflection in there
I want your reassurance
I want to have you close to me
I want that no matter the distance
for me you are just an eye blink away
I want to laugh with you
I want you to dry my tears
I want you shoulder to lean on
I want to give you all my love
I want to tell you all my secrets
I want to be with you
I want to be the only one
give me only i assurance
one promise
we will fight through thick and thin
we will be together forever
and not a soul shall separate us.

My Birthday Wishes for you

Today is your special day

The day when a while back pain brought joy

The day when you turn a year older

The day when you turn wiser

It is a new year for you

I wish that your wishes will come to pass

I wish that this year you have more joy

I wish that you will receive abundant blessings in the new year

I wish for you greatness

But most of all may all be well with you

May your heart be more at peace

May you give and receive much more love

May your aspirations powered by your inspiration

Come to pass

May you every morning be brighter than the most sparkling jewel

May you enjoy your today, tomorrow and all other days to come.

Heartfelt

I have taken my time

looking back at each and every moment

just taking a ponder

had i not met you

I must say things have changed

you may not believe me

but that's just the truth

i hope you can believe me

saying i cant live without you

that may be a hyperbole

but i need you around me

i dont want to walk ahead of you

i may not be the best lead

but walking together

you and i

makes my life fulfilling

i want to believe its the same with you

as i enjoy watching you in every way

right now you may not be near

but i want you to know you are so dear

i enjoy sharing my moments with you

those that camera may not capture

those that words may not tell

just those only the heart can speak

My heart feels closer to yours

Don't deny me the chance

because though my words may not tell

my heart yells it all

all to the skies

all to the world

even to the heavens

saying you are my all.

You mean so much to me

Love or Obsession

Obsession is the domination of one's thoughts or feelings by a persistent idea, image, and desire. It can be of many things ranging from people, sports, objects, drugs, cars and anything that one holds valuable to their lives. It normally leads to confusion and insecurity. A very common obsession has to do with people; women with men and vice versa. People fail to control what they feel towards others. They seem to forget that they do have the will power to control the feelings and not let the feelings control them. People have forgotten to use their willpower and their intelligence to distinguish true love from obsession. Obsession from many experiences has led to the loss of lives. Many people think that all they hear are tales. That is not the case always, not with what I will be telling you now. This all happened in a rich agricultural part of Kenya. A man met her and for sure he knew that never would they part ways. He had met the woman he knew he would spend his entire life with. No one or nothing would change his mind. She also saw the same with him and in all the excitement she agreed to commit. They had a very beautiful ceremony where she said “I do”. The covenant had been sealed. The sign was there. The ring, so beautiful and perfect for her small fingers, forever together. No man was about to put them asunder. They stayed in the marriage for three years. By then everyone’s true colors could no longer be hidden. They could no longer bear each other. They had to part ways. Thank God they had no children. The man could not bear the reality. Once again he was all alone in his life and all he could do was make her life a living hell. He started sending her threatening messages. He did this severally that he left her no choice than to go to the police. They had a case in court… Was it really worth all the threats? Most people who viewed them from a distance could not see the importance. But only the man could explain. He had it in himself that only she could be part of her life; then and forever. On the wake of the hearing the man could not face it. He decided that not even her decision was fit enough to put them asunder. He spent a whole night sharpening his tool. The tool he would use to end her life. At the crack of dawn, he waited for her at the stage. Once she was off the matatu he ambushed her and with the sharp knife he stabbed his forever one and only love to death. She had called for help before she breathed her last. The people who heard her cry came running and with the same knife stabbed the now separated husband to death. Seven times and he too breathed his last.
A death of two! Was it really worth the obsession? These and many more question lingered on the onlookers’ minds. Some suggested they be laid to rest together. For not even death could part them. This is just a reality of the things an obsession makes one do. The sad reality that has put an end to many. All I hope is that we can have control and intelligence when dealing with our emotions. Do we have to witness another death to learn?

Respect Your Secretary

She picks the phone calls and forwards them to you. She brings you a cup of tea and always with a smile. She entertains your guest as they await you to end your meetings. She is your secretary. Every day we take them for granted and at times we make their lives a living hell. It was not until i tried to fit in their shoes that i knew how much it presses. I was assigned what seems as one of their simplest yet common task; to write minutes. It took me a whole day to compile them.It was followed by despair and frustrations. It took me a another three hours to format it and still i was not done. I hated every small bit of it. It was giving me a hell of a time. This work is not as simple as it seems. It needs patience. its a talent or may be a calling. try to be one and trust me you may opt to increase her pay for the simple yet complex things she does. Give them the respect they deserve.

Across the bridge

When most of us think about Kenya especially at this point in time, we think of a country with nothing. I would like to call it a country of No Thing. At this point in time many factors are tending towards that: There is no water, there is no electricity, there is no fuel, there are no jobs, there is no security, there is no oneness(tribalism is at its highest), there is no land, the housing pathetic- buildings collapse, rates too high, built on road reserves creating room for demarcation and demolition, the roads have very many potholes, the carnage on the road are just excess. The education system is zero. The governance very poor, democracy excess making it hard to govern, Patriotism nil, health and sanitation poor, vengeance excess. Most of all there is no certainty. The fear unthinkable. This is what our Kenya is now but in the same country there are very beautiful safaris experiences, the weather is just conducive, the landscapes are stunning. We have pristine beaches and coral reef; equatorial forest and snow capped mountains; searing deserts, cool highlands, the great Rift valley with its escarpments; ancient granitic hills; flat desert land. We have the greatest and most renowned athletes, the immigration of the wild beest (eighth wonder of the world). Kenya has timeless cultures; it has excellent rugby players. The game parks are many and the the animals in the wild are many, beautiful and worth rethinking Kenya as a land not of nothing but just a beautiful haven with many obstacles but all in all a beautiful country. A land worth living in. A land worth calling a home.

Finally My vote Counted

Many of us love to watch the game of football. Most of us have our favorite teams. Suicides are committed, bets are placed and lots of beer taken. For others they just watch from the house. For those like me, we just grit our teeth hoping that our favorite team will win. When the worst comes to worst; we pray that it ends as a goalless draw. When we loose, some of us shed a tear hoping the ancestor of the team will intervene.That beside the point; life to me is like a football match. It may not seem so because we do not quite plan its eventuality but many are the times that we make many passes hoping to achieve our goal eventually. Talk of attack; as compared to life would be the point at which we are ready to explore the opportunities out there taking in mind other peoples weaknesses and fully utilizing your strengths. Defense would be the obstacles in life. They will try to catch while you try to pass, they will intercept when you think you are almost there or even knock all your efforts away. Throw-in or corner comes quite often in life. These would be when we have a second chance to attempt something that the defense may have tried to deviate us from the goal. There are times when the energy put in is galore and the means of achieving the goal are quite challenging. Despite all that i would like to say we take a long kick and score the goal. Through out our lives we work tirelessly, sweat drapes us and when we are just about to get there, when the achievement is in the offing the ball just goes over the bar or even hits the goal post quite hard then deviates.The ball also at times just misses a few inches to touch the line. The goal there is not achieved. But just like a footballer who despairs not even when there is no hope of winning, who continues to sweat even when the sweat will produce nothing, whose injuries do not hinder him from achieving the goal; you and me should do the same. We should stand firm, stand tall and toil hard no matter what comes our way. Life is beautiful, it is glorious, it is worth a celebration. Lets play safe and live life to the fullest.

Life in a footballer's eye

Many of us love to watch the game of football. Most of us have our favorite teams. Suicides are committed, bets are placed and lots of beer taken. For others they just watch from the house. For those like me, we just grit our teeth hoping that our favorite team will win. When the worst comes to worst; we pray that it ends as a goalless draw. When we loose, some of us shed a tear hoping the ancestor of the team will intervene.That beside the point; life to me is like a football match. It may not seem so because we do not quite plan its eventuality but many are the times that we make many passes hoping to achieve our goal eventually. Talk of attack; as compared to life would be the point at which we are ready to explore the opportunities out there taking in mind other peoples weaknesses and fully utilizing your strengths. Defense would be the obstacles in life. They will try to catch while you try to pass, they will intercept when you think you are almost there or even knock all your efforts away. Throw-in or corner comes quite often in life. These would be when we have a second chance to attempt something that the defense may have tried to deviate us from the goal. There are times when the energy put in is galore and the means of achieving the goal are quite challenging. Despite all that i would like to say we take a long kick and score the goal. Through out our lives we work tirelessly, sweat drapes us and when we are just about to get there, when the achievement is in the offing the ball just goes over the bar or even hits the goal post quite hard then deviates.The ball also at times just misses a few inches to touch the line. The goal there is not achieved. But just like a footballer who despairs not even when there is no hope of winning, who continues to sweat even when the sweat will produce nothing, whose injuries do not hinder him from achieving the goal; you and me should do the same. We should stand firm, stand tall and toil hard no matter what comes our way. Life is beautiful, it is glorious, it is worth a celebration. Lets play safe and live life to the fullest.

Why???????????????

I have never fathomed this
Neither does it seem like soon
I just can't know
Why are they so relentless?
Why only in the presence of others?
Why is it so hard to bear it?
Why does it really happen?
Is all the pain really necessary?
Will i ever comprehend?
How long will it be?
May be never
I will only wait to see

Rogue Driver,....? Watch Out

He was the usual notorious driver going about his business of blocking other drivers from going about their own businesses. The hooting was not working; neither did the pleas to allow them to pass. His rogue behavior was very evident. He was sure he was the indispensable driver driving his old, rusty Grip. Shock on him…this happened to be the day he was to be tamed. The people who had pleaded for way were the CID officers. Lucky for them they had no uniform to betray their hidden identity. He disembarked from the Toyota corolla fuming with so much rage. He just could not take a bit of it any more. This had to be rogue driver 40th day when as per the officer he would pay for his crime. "Get out of the car!" he yelled. He held him firmly by the collar and as the driver dared the angry cop where he was to sit, the cop answered, "Unafikiria utakaa kwa gari ya nani?" The boot of the vehicle yanked open and the driver unfortunately was shoveled in like a bag of hay. The boot closed and the search for the conductor began but to no avail. His youthful look and formal dressing on that day saved him from their ruthless hands. They drove very carelessly forgetting that the load they were carrying was actually a human being. Grip was grip no more. It was left with neither a driver nor a conductor. What may have happened next? well only the driver can tell.

Troubled

I have tried to fathom
i am trying to ponder
i just cannot get it
all i know i am scared

The thought of it
fills me with fear galore
with every tear
i just cant understand


I think of them hacking
i think of them torturing
i think of them whipping
i think of burning

How could they be so cruel?
how so inhuman?
how so inconsiderate?
to end their life like that

The thought of dozing off
suddenly cut short by the fear
the thought of a tomorrow
seems just far like a solar eclipse

I try to close my eyes
I can only see it happen
i see the blood trickle
i hear the shouts and screams



The peace of a quiet night
has now turned into a scary ghost
the terror is all over their face
The terror of the death
the terror of the killers amongst them


When shall we find peace
what do they really want
How much blood will they pour
is all I ask
just let us know
let them know
stop creating a nightmare
just let there be peace

The Agony of a First Love

I did watch her from a distance.I really could not comprehend nor could i comfort her. Not that i did not want to but because i did not know how.Written all over her face was the intensity of the excruciating pain.I had known her to be a happy one. But not this morning when she awoke. some may say she woke up on her left side, others may not quite understand. First things first...other than the usual which should have been cleaning her face, she took a lighter. She burned them all. From the biggest to the smallest. It seemed like a ceremony when seen from a distance, but the sad reality was that she was trying to burn down all the memories. I only wished for her that the memory she had of him would turn into ashes just like the gifts she had set ablaze had.I hoped that her memories would soon fade like the smoke did. i wished that within no time she would smile again. I could not be sure of this. Did all the praises she had of him , all the sweet memories, even the rhythm of his instruments and musical notes have to be forgotten now? She had just had enough. All that time, all she awaited ,all she really longed for would be no more. I saw no tear trickle down her cheek but that i was sure would take not long. All this was the result of the agony. The agony of a first love. A love she thought she would walk down the aisle... a love she had so cherished...I actually wanted to make fun of the situation. wanted to welcome her to the singles club. The club where there was less pain from third parties. A club where she could do whatever she wanted without explaining anything. On second thoughts i couldn't. All i can do now is pray for time to heal her wound soon...for now it is too deep...very red...i hope it wont take her a step backwards..i hope it takes her 2 steps ahead

A Breaking

The thought of it all
The mention of it all
As I heard the sharp pain
The pain of the breaking spirit

In you I counted
In you I shared my laughter
In you I confided my deepest secrets
Never thought for a moment
What it would be with a breaking

I always gave it my all
I hoped it would be mutual
I swore never to break your spirit
To me it was unbreakable

The promises were too many
Day in day out
We longed for that one day
We hoped that that day
We would walk down the aisle

What happened to the promises?
For you they were to be broken
What happened to the feelings?
That a thought of breaking I gave no chance
What happened to the heart?
So dear…so near… so tender for a breaking

So many times I have pondered
So many times I have wondered
So many times was a mystery
Just so many times

In the end I have a lesson
I have put all broken pieces together
I have learnt to be keen to my every feeling
As no more will I ever stand a break
I have known the signs
I will prevent it earlier
To lead my heart far
In the only place
Where I will know no break